Behind Closed Doors
The Architecture of a Shared Delusion
In the monitoring room, sealed tightly behind reinforced steel doors, Jackalope watched the ten prisoner cells with unreadable black eyes. The mechanical rabbit’s long ears twitched as he swiped a paw across the console, cycling through various camera feeds. As he had predicted, the flash of blonde hair in the second cell was missing. Yuno was out again, presumably to pursue Es while the Warden was supposed to be busy with the administrative fallout of the previous extractions.
At this point, three days since their first "interrogation" turned into something physical, Jackalope was used to the sight of Es failing his own protocols. It was almost laughable. The rabbit swiped a card, gaining access to the high-definition view of the interrogation room.
On the monitor, the scene was far from professional. Es was no longer seated in the chair across from the prisoner; instead, he had been gathered into Yuno’s arms. She was sitting back in the heavy chair, and Es was positioned between her legs, leaning against her chest in a way that could only be described as spooning. Despite the blush creeping up his neck, the boy was still trying to remain professional, balancing a clipboard on Yuno’s thigh as he scribbled down notes.
Jackalope recalled Es’s behavior with the other prisoners. He had seen the Warden punch anyone who gave him a hard time during these sessions. He had seen him dismiss off-topic conversations with a cold, sharp tongue and scold himself for hours if he felt a flicker of empathy. But with Yuno, Es was unapologetic for getting swept up in her flow. He was drowning, and he seemed to have decided that the water was quite pleasant.
Inside the room, the air was thick with a strange, domestic silence, broken only by the scratching of Es’s pen. He was wrapping up a brief run-through of Yuno’s sins, trying to maintain the facade of a judge even as her chin rested comfortably on his shoulder.
"So, as a result of intentionally throwing yourself down these stairs, your child died inside you," Es questioned, his voice steady despite the fact that Yuno was currently tracing the seam of his glove with her thumb. He braced his arm on her thigh to steady his writing hand.
"Yes, honey," Yuno affirmed.
Es choked on his own saliva at the pet name, his shoulders jerking. He coughed into his hand, trying to regain his composure while Yuno giggled against the back of his neck.
"Don't call me that," he hissed, though he didn't move away.
"Why not? It’s accurate, isn't it? We’re so cozy," she teased, though her voice quickly settled back into a softer, more reflective tone. "After the fall, there were lots of complications. I spent some days at the hospital. It was very white, very quiet. Not like this place at all."
Es processed the information solemnly, returning his focus to the documents. He forced himself to see the clinical reality of the act—the physical trauma, the medical records. "I see..."
"...She was going to be a girl, you know," Yuno whispered. Her gaze drifted away from the back of Es’s head, settling on the cold, gray walls surrounding them. "A cute little girl that I’d have probably spoiled, if I were the type to like children."
Es didn't look up from the paper, his wrist moving automatically as he noted the detail. "You cared enough to find out her gender, then. Most people who want to forget wouldn't ask."
"Of course I did, Es-kun!" Yuno suddenly exclaimed, her mood shifting with that characteristic, whiplash speed. She hooked an arm around the boy's neck, playfully mimicking a choking hold. "You think so low of me, don't you? You think I’m just a cold, heartless machine!"
Under any other circumstances, Es would have reacted with violence or a cold reprimand. He wouldn't take this kind of playfighting from anyone else in the facility. But instead, he let out a brief, genuine chuckle. He reached up, gently prying her wrist away from his throat.
"No, no... I don't think that," he said, his voice quiet. "It’s only natural to want to know the basics. She would have been all yours, after all. Not a transaction. Just yours."
Yuno lowered her arm, the playfulness draining out of her as quickly as it had arrived. She leaned back in the chair, pulling Es with her so that his back was firmly pressed against her chest. "All mine, huh... with nobody to share her with. Her joys. Maybe her first steps and words. No sugar daddies, no clients, just a little version of me that didn't know how to lie yet."
Even as she spoke of the life she had ended, Yuno managed a small smile. It was devoid of the mask she usually wore for the cameras—the one that was all teeth and empty eyes. This smile was tired.
"It’s not like I’d want her in any life, never," Yuno continued, her voice dropping to a near-whisper. "I’m not a mother. I’m a girl who likes gifts and attention. But... the idea of someone being there with me. Someone who doesn't leave after a favor is done. Through all that... it would have been bearable."
Yuno hadn't realized it, but Es had stopped writing. He was looking up at her, twisting his neck to give her his full attention. His eyes, usually sharp and judgmental, were soft. He saw the girl behind the abortion; he saw the girl who was so terrified of being abandoned that she had killed the only thing that would have been biologically incapable of leaving her.
"Someone... as in, the father, whoever he might be," Es suggested, trying to bridge the gap between her confession and her reality.
"Yeah," Yuno nodded, her head coming down to rest on Es’s shoulder, her blonde hair tickling his cheek. "Though, it’s no longer something I wish for. In fact... I don't think I ever want children. It’s not a goal of mine in life, after all. I’d be a terrible influence. I’d probably teach them how to manipulate people before they could crawl."
"...Good. Me neither," Es said with a small, instinctive smile.
The words were out of his mouth before he could filter them. It was a slip-up of monumental proportions—an admission of a shared future, or at least a shared philosophy. Yuno’s eyes widened, and then her laugh rang through the interrogation room like a silver bell, bright and mocking and delighted.
Es practically hissed, his face turning a shade of red that rivaled the emergency lights. He scrambled to pull himself out of her lap, his pen clattering to the floor. "L-let go! That was—I was merely agreeing from a logistical standpoint!"
"No!" Yuno laughed, tightening her grip around his waist so he couldn't escape. "Hehe... Es! You were hoping I was on the same page, weren't youuu! You were thinking about us!"
"Yes—I mean, no! Fuck off!" Es shouted, his ears burning.
"Only bad boys cuss, you know! Are you going to judge yourself now, Warden-kun?"
Yuno’s laughter died down into soft chuckles as she wiped a tear of mirth from her eye. Es sighed, his chest heaving as he caught his breath, finally slumping back against her. He was too exhausted to keep fighting her, and the warmth of her body was too addictive to truly flee. His palms felt sweaty under his gloves, and his fingers felt clumsy.
Yuno leaned over his shoulder, her lips close to his ear. "So... what did you really mean by that, Es-kun? Do you see anything ahead? Beyond the bars and the songs?"
Es stared at the blank line on his clipboard. "I see something," he started, scratching the back of his neck. "Something I probably shouldn't be thinking about if I want to ensure the prisoners' safety and the integrity of the trials. I see you, with... with me, for one. Everything we did over the past few days... it cannot mean nothing, can it?"
"With you..." Yuno repeated. The word seemed to hang in the air, fragile and heavy all at once. Her eyes shone for a brief moment, reflecting the sterile overhead lights. "Yeah... yeah. All those kisses and the cuddling... they really happened for a reason. I thought I was scared to say it, because loving a single person is foreign to me. Usually, I spread it out so it doesn't hurt when one of them disappears."
She turned him around in her lap so he was facing her. She cupped his face, her thumbs stroking his cheeks. "But you’re the Warden. You can't disappear. You’re stuck here in this beautiful, horrible cage with me."
"I am the one who holds the keys," Es reminded her, though his voice lacked conviction.
"Then use them," Yuno whispered. "Not to let me out. But to let yourself in."
Es looked at her, really looked at her. He saw the sin of her past—the stairs, the hospital, the cold detachment. But he also saw the girl who was currently holding him as if he were the only solid thing in a shifting world. He reached up, his gloved hand covering hers on his cheek.
"I’ve already made my decision for the first trial," Es said, his voice regaining some of its authority. "But the second... the second is different. You aren't just a prisoner to me anymore, Yuno. You’re a complication. A bothersome, loud, expensive complication."
"Expensive?" Yuno teased, her nose brushing against his. "I haven't even given you the bill for today yet."
"Don't you dare," Es warned, but he was leaning in.
"I love you, Es," she said. This time, it wasn't the 'I love everyone' she had used before. It was directed. It was a spear. "And I don't want anything in return for it. No gifts, no money. Just... stay."
Es closed his eyes, the weight of his hat feeling lighter than it ever had. "I’m not going anywhere. I have to judge you, remember?"
"Then judge me," she murmured against his lips. "Forgive me or kill me, but don't leave me cold."
The kiss that followed was slow and deep, a silent pact made in the heart of a prison that was never meant for love. It was the sound of a warden losing his grip on the law and a prisoner finding a reason to stop running.
In the monitoring room, Jackalope watched the screen with a low, clicking sound in his throat. He saw the Warden and the Prisoner, entwined in a chair designed for interrogation, oblivious to the cameras and the judgment of the facility.
"A girl who didn't want to be a mother," Jackalope mused, his voice echoing in the empty room. "And a boy who never had a mother. How poetic. And how very, very dangerous."
He reached out and turned off the monitor, the screen plunging into blackness. He didn't need to see the rest. He knew how this story ended. In Milgram, every warmth was followed by a chill, and every forgiveness came with a price that even Yuno Kashiki couldn't afford.
But for now, in the quiet of the interrogation room, the heater was on, the door was locked, and the Warden was exactly where he wanted to be.
"2,500 yen," Es whispered as they broke apart, his forehead resting against hers.
"Huh?" Yuno blinked, confused.
"That’s what I’m charging you for the emotional distress of that 'honey' comment," Es grumbled, though he was smiling.
Yuno burst into laughter, pulling him back into a hug that squeezed the air out of his lungs. "Put it on my tab, Warden-kun! I’m good for it!"
"You really aren't," Es sighed, but he wrapped his arms around her anyway, letting the clipboard fall to the floor. The notes could wait. The law could wait. For the first time in his forgotten life, Es was exactly where he belonged.